Monday, November 29, 2010

Our first trip

I never really posted many details from our first trip. I got up at 1 am today and couldn't fall back asleep. So, I figured I could use the time to post some details on our first trip. I have a feeling this will be very long. If you like to read, enjoy!

We arrived very late on Saturday night (10/23). I was a little disappointed that we couldn't see Ethiopia from the sky at all, but it sure felt nice to be landing in our daughter's birth country. The flights were decent. Neither one of us slept much, but that was okay since it was bed time once we arrived anyway. We got our visas rather quickly and made it through customs without any issues. I found the line to exchange money, which wasn't long but took quite a while, and Chris grabbed our luggage. We quickly found our driver and loaded into the van to head to our hotel. It is a little chilly in the evening (about 55 degrees), so I was glad for my sweater. Since it was late, we really couldn't see much, but I tried to take in as much as I could.

We arrived at our hotel and were shown to our room. The hotel was very nice. We had been warned that the beds were quite hard and that hot water was scarce, but there was plenty of hot water at night and we were so tired that even the hard bed didn't phase us.

I woke up early the next morning and just stared out the window for quite a while. The air is thick with diesel fumes and even though our windows were closed, my eyes burned a bit and watered for the first hour, or so. Our hotel was gated, as is nearly every building, and beautiful compared to many of the surrounding buildings. There were lots of shacks made of corrugated metal with gaping holes surrounding this hotel. There were a few nicer buildings scattered amongst the shacks, as well. There was a woman outside hanging laundry and another sweeping the ground. There were several men walking through the streets and a few random animals. It was Sunday morning, so I suppose the men could have been headed to church.
These two buildings are just across the street from each other.Sunday (10/24) was totally a free day for us. We weren't too sure what the plan was, but we knew that we wanted to get out and explore the city. There was another woman at our hotel who was also adopting through our same agency. Her name is Heather and she is from Texas. She was on this trip by herself and we had connected quite a bit online ahead of time. So, we got up and went down to breakfast hoping to find her there. She was there. We met, talked about our arrivals and quickly made a plan for the day. The hotel concierge was so helpful and called a driver for us. Our driver took us all over the place for a very minimal fee--especially when you consider we could just split the cost with Heather.

After leaving our hotel, we picked up a couple that were in the process of adopting an infant girl. they had decided to stay in between their court date and embassy date, which turned out to be about 6 weeks, I believe. We were all a little jealous of their ability to do that. They were ready to get home with their little girl and were nearing the end of their trip. Our driver just had to take them to where their daughter was staying so that they could spend the day with her.

We first visited the National Museum where they house many Ethiopian artifacts that were interesting to see. Lucy is also housed at this museum. She is believed to be some sort of proof in the link between ape and man, perhaps one of the first that walked upright. Evolution isn't really my thing, but it was interesting to see. After the museum, we had lunch at a great little Italian place across the street. Ethiopia once fell under Italian rule, so there are nearly as many Italian restaurants as there are traditional Ethiopian ones. The Italian food is surprisingly good, too. All the food is surprisingly inexpensive.

After lunch, we headed to the Lion Zoo. Sunday is a family day, so there were many children there with their parents. There is a small amusement park for children at the zoo and a few lions and other animals to observe. I think that we were the main attraction wherever we walked, though. Three extremely white people tend to stand out in Ethiopia. We didn't mind, we just loved seeing all the children with their families. The people of Ethiopia are so beautiful.
The weather was beautiful. The average daily temp was about 75 degrees, 55 at night. It was wonderful being outside amongst the Ethiopian people. Their culture is so very different from ours. The people are so patient and don't seem to feel so entitled. Driving is an interesting experience. Intersections are not nearly as governed as ours are and people have to (gasp!) be considerate of one another and sometimes stop to let someone else in. It was quite refreshing to experience a society that was not "all about me" for a while.

After the zoo, we decided to do some shopping. Our agency planned for some shopping in the next two days, but only about 45 minutes and I wanted to get everything out of the way on this trip for a few reasons, so we took our time, got what we wanted and hardly spent anything. Beautiful, hand crafted items just aren't very expensive. We were able to get many gifts for friends and family and quite a few keepsakes for Kayla for her future. My plan was to purchase 1 thing for each birthday, years 1-18, so that she'll have a great collection when she's an adult. I was able to do this with no problem and might have enough to give her until she's 21! We got some treasures for ourselves and our home, as well. Then, we went to a great coffee shop where Heather and Chris enjoyed the coffee and I bought 15 bags of beans. Outside of the coffee shop, there was a man selling traditional Ethiopian coffee pots. We bought two (one for us and one for Kayla--only one made it home in one piece, so hopefully I can get another on our second trip).
(The fact that there is a beggar in the background of this photo was not lost on us. It was extremely awkward to take pictures as "tourists" in this country--smiling and happy. But having photos with us frowning all the time didn't seem like what we'd want to show our daughter in a few years, so we smiled even though our hearts were very heavy. I think this is the only together and smiling photo we got of us out in public. When we were with her, it was very easy to smile!)

After shopping, we weren't too sure what else we should do. Our driver suggested visiting a Christian Orthodox church. We were all happy to do that. It was beautiful. There were many stained glass windows that displayed the stories in the Bible. There were different chambers, some we could see, some we could not. The ceilings were painted beautifully and everything had some meaning behind it. This is clearly a very traditional and reverent denomination.
After all of this, it was time to pick up the other couple we had met and take them back to their hotel and then we were ready to head back to our hotel, as well. We had opted not to have dinner at our hotel, so after spending some time in our rooms we hired a taxi to take us to a traditional Ethiopian restaurant. There is no table to sit at, you just sit around a large, raised basket. It is cultural to wash your hands before dinner, so one of the staff brings around a basin, some warm water and soap. Eating is only supposed to be done with the right hand. Food is typically served in small piles on top of a piece of injera. Injera is a large, round, flat, sour, spongy piece of bread-like food. We all enjoyed our meal and were able to stay for some of the live entertainment--music and dancing. There was one short power outage while we were at the restaurant (not uncommon in Ethiopia at all). As soon as the lights went out, nearly every person on the restaurant whipped out a cell phone and opened it for the light. It was a little humorous, but maybe you had to be there.
We headed back to the hotel after dinner and were feeling pretty ready for bed. In the 5 nights we were gone, I don't think I slept a total of 20 hours, so going to bed didn't really mean sleep to me, but it was still nice to settle in. I knew that we would be meeting our little one in the morning and really didn't think I'd sleep too well with that on my mind anyway.

Monday (10/25) morning, we woke up and had breakfast at the hotel and then waited for our driver. He picked us up and took us to the office building of our agency where we dropped off all our donations (we had taken 2 suitcases FULL) and sat through an orientation on what to expect, what to do/not to do, etc... Then, we headed out to meet our little girl.

When we got to the care center, we climbed the stairs and took off our shoes--trading them for the care center sandals. Then, we waited inside for them to bring our kids to us. Heather got her little boy first. He came down the stairs and they handed him to her. He just hugged her neck and clung to her. He was a bit hesitant to look any of us in the eye, but he was so precious. We expected Kayla to come down the same stairs, but she was just brought out of a room on the main floor (this is where the baby room is). The nanny handed her to me and I definitely got a bit teary. She was so tiny and cuddle-able. Chris was mainly taking pictures and video. We got to spend about 2 hours with Kayla, fairly uninterrupted, and even got to feed her and then put her to bed before we had to leave.
The Care Center and all their laundry
We had lunch at a golf course. Very nice and again, very inexpensive. There was a random cat looking for scraps. I'm not a big fan of cats at all, but she looked hungry, so I may have dropped a few things on the ground for her. After lunch, we headed to the leprosy hospital where lepers make beautiful handwoven crafts to sell to help fund their care. This was a really interesting stop and quite eye opening into the differences in medical care between Ethiopia and the US. We bought quite a bit here and briefly met some beautiful people. There were even a few cute little kids running around the grounds.
Our driver then took us back to the offices so that we could meet with the lawyer to discuss what would happen when we went to court the next morning. We briefly went over some questions the judge might ask and then our agency's staff went over even more questions with us. It was a little stressful to think about the process, but nice to feel prepared.
Then, we got to see our Kayla again. We were only supposed to have about 30 minutes with her before meeting with the pediatrician to ask about any health concerns we might have. Fortunately, the doctor was quite late, so we got to be with our her for about 1 1/2 hours (this is probably the only time I've ever been grateful to a doctor for being so late!). Finally, it was time to see the doctor and we brought Kayla with us. We asked him questions and learned answers. Some were good, some not so good. She doesn't have any heart problems, which was a previous concern, but her lack of ability to bear any weight on her legs was of much greater concern than we had ever been told. It was pretty disconcerting to only learn this information while we were there, but there's really nothing you can do about it, so we just soberly said our good-byes and went back to our hotel. It was a very quiet dinner at the hotel. I think we were all just trying to process the information that we had been given throughout the day.

Tuesday (10/26) morning, we got up and prepared to go to court. When we got to the hotel lobby, the staff was preparing a coffee ceremony for us. This is a traditional ceremony done for people quite often. Grass is spread over the floor, popcorn is popped, coffee beans are roasted right there and then ground and turned into coffee all while some very strong smelling incense is burned. Unfortunately, we weren't able to stay for the whole ceremony as our driver arrived on time. When it came down to being late for court or skipping part of the coffee ceremony, the choice was pretty easy!
We got to the courthouse a bit ahead of our lawyer, so we waited for him. Once inside, we took an elevator upstairs. We then waited in a large square room with chairs all along the edges. We were the first group to arrive, so we thought we would enter the judge's chambers first. Wrong. Two-three groups went through before us and all appeared to pass. Some were Americans, some were European. Our lawyer was getting a bit antsy by then because he clearly assumed we would get to go first, as well. He finally spoke with the judge and it was Heather's turn to go in! She came out 2 minutes later and had passed and then it was our turn. Walking in there is nerve wracking. Sure, you know what she's going to ask and you have the answers prepared, we even knew that pretty much everyone passes, but it's just so final and not passing is a possibility. After about 2 minutes and maybe 6 questions, the judge announced, "She is yours". And, that was that.

Our schedule told us that we were supposed to do shopping and eat lunch and then have a brief goodbye with our kids several hours later. Our driver, however, asked if we'd like to go to the hotel and then the care center. None of us could figure out why we'd need to go to the hotel (maybe to change?), so we just said we'd like to go to the Care Center. Being able to see our kids, legally our kids, right after passing court was awesome! We got to feed them again and put them down for their naps. It was a great visit and a very positive goodbye.
We then at lunch at a coffee shop that is pretty much identical to Starbucks, did a quick 45 minute shopping stop and got the rest of whatever we wanted and then headed to our hotel to pack and get ready to leave Ethiopia (and our kids) behind. We decided to go out for dinner. The hotel staff recommended a great Italian restaurant within walking distance, so we set out to find it. It took a little longer than we expected, but the walk was great. The restaurant was closed and not set to open for at least another hour, so we weren't too sure what to do, but one of the staff spotted us and told us he'd open early for us. Seriously, the people are SO nice. We had a great dinner and enjoyed every minute of it. Then, we walked back to the hotel. Never once did we feel the least bit unsafe or threatened.

Side note: Night life is a whole different experience in Ethiopia than it is here. We never really got to be among the people, but driving through town at night was really interesting. There are little markets open all over the place and people are out in droves to do their shopping. The same 5-10 stores seem to repeat every 5 blocks, or so. This must be for all the walkers--so they don't have to travel far with what they need. Each store sells something different. One store for meat, one for fruits and veggies, etc... It was very interesting to see this difference between our two cultures. Whenever we want something, we just get in the car, park as close as possible, run into Walmart and get whatever we want from toilet paper to clothing to grapes. They have it all. It is convenient. We never saw any place like this in Ethiopia.

After we got back to our hotel, we quickly showered, finished packing and headed downstairs so our driver could take us to the airport. At the airport, we got on some computers to email home and bought some great children's books in a gift shop. Then, we boarded the plane and headed home. It was a MUCH longer trip home than the one there had been (not in actual time, but it felt like it with the weight of all we had experienced).

Africa and back in 5 days is not something I would highly recommend. It is a whirlwind of a trip and it kicked my butt. It took me days to recover from the travels and the incredible lack of sleep. I could hardly keep my eyes open past 5:30 that first night back. Now, a full month later, I am just aching to get back and bring home the beautiful little girl that we met, adopted and left behind in the 3 days that we were in her birth country. I can't wait to get back to Ethiopia and experience more of the country and see if I love the countryside as much as I do the city. I am looking forward to meeting Kayla's birth mother, though I'm also extremely nervous about it, too. I can only hope that this week, we finally get some sort of travel news. Not knowing when has been one of the hardest parts of this whole journey.

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