Baby, All I Want for Christmas is...

YOU! So, I'm coming to get you.

Kayla at 4 months--the first photo we saw of her 4/6/10.

Kayla at 7.5 months, July 2010.

Kayla at 11 months--when we went for court 10/26/10.

We are leaving today. It is actually happening and we couldn't be happier. Please keep our travels in your prayers--as well as Kayla and our boys (and my parents--who are watching them). We will be home just in time to ring in the New Year.

Wednesday & Thursday will be spent traveling.
Friday will be spent with Kayla!!!
Saturday will also be spent with Kayla--Christmas with 1 of my 3 kids, at least.
Sunday will be spent traveling South to meet Kayla's birth mother.
Monday, we will return to Addis and take custody of our daughter.
Tuesday, we will visit the US Embassy to make everything official.
Wednesday, we just hang out with Kayla.
Thursday, we get Kayla's paperwork and head home.
Friday, we land in the US and Kayla automatically becomes a US citizen.
We will then head home and begin our lives as a family of 5.

Thank you for celebrating this moment with us. We have felt so loved and supported through this whole process. Here's hoping the tail end goes smoothly!

Tomorrow!!!

We are leaving tomorrow!!! We will take custody of the most beautiful baby girl in the world on Monday--just 6 days from today. We will bring her home and officially be a family of 5 (again) in 10 days. Tomorrow cannot get here soon enough. I am so ready for this.

2 days

Two more days. Honestly, I could totally skip Tuesday and jump right to Wednesday. I'm READY!!! We are all packed and ready to walk out the door. I'll spend Tuesday wrapping up loose ends and loving on my boys. But, honestly, I could skip over Tuesday without any regret. I'm ready to go, I desperately want to go but I still can't quite make myself believe that it's 100% for sure that we're leaving. So, if I could skip Tuesday and jump right to Wednesday, I'd just turn off my phone, not check my email, get on that plane and end up in Ethiopia--none the wiser if some bad news did happen to show up.

Two more days. That's it. Then, I'm on my way to bringing my little girl home. No, I'm no where near ready for all the changes that will bring, but I'm ready to take them on as they come and do my absolute best for all three of my kids. I'm ready to start fighting for her health--emotional and physical. I am ready to start working on her development. I am ready to help my boys adjust to being big brothers (especially Reily since this is all new territory to him). I know it's going to be tough and I know it's going to exhaust me, but I'm as ready as any mama has ever been.

Two more days.

Preparation Craziness

Ok, all you adoptive mamas out there...what's the craziest thing you've done to prepare for your trip to pick up your child? There is a lot on that to-do list and I've been crossing things off left and right. But, tonight I did the craziest thing by far. My sister offered to wax my armpits and I let her. OUCH!!! But, shaving them in ice cold showers isn't much fun either. So, that's done. Weird.

Honestly, there's not much left on the list. We still don't know whether or not we're going for sure, but we're ready to go if we are. After tomorrow, I'll feel a little more confident that we're going if we don't hear otherwise. 3 more days!

Edited to add:

Actually, I just remembered that last night I did something almost this crazy. At about 7 pm, I realized that I had forgotten all about making baby food for Kayla for when we get home. She is quite delayed, so I'm fairly confident she won't be eating regular solids yet. I took my boys out at 7:45 pm to Walmart (blech) and nearly ran into several people with my cart, mostly because they thought that stopping in the middle of an aisle for no reason seemed like a great idea, and bought stuff to turn into baby food. Then, I got home and made baby food. I have pears, peaches, apple sauce, sweet potatoes, peas and green beans all ready to go. Tonight, I've been working on chicken. I can't stand the store bought baby food meat and I have yet to meet one child who will eat the stuff. I KNOW that I will NOT be cleaning that out of cloth diapers--it smells worse coming out than it does going in and going in it reminds me of wet cat food. So, I am making the chicken myself. A Walmart run with 2 kids who should have been in bed an hour earlier was also definitely a crazy adoption trip preparation step.

The Plan

If you have met me, you know that I always have a plan and a backup plan and quite often a backup plan for the original backup plan. I'm okay when my plans don't work out, mostly because I have the backup(s), but I NEED to have a plan. I function best with little to no unknowns. So, I have a plan for the holidays--and a couple of backup plans, but those will stay in my head unless they're needed!

We leave 12/22 and will be home 12/31. This means that we will technically miss Christmas with our boys. They are 4 and 5, so I feel fairly confident that we can just delay Christmas without them finding out. If possible, I'd really like to hide the fact that we're ditching them over Christmas for their sister that they're already going to resent having in the home, most likely. I'm sure they'll figure it out as they get older, but if we can keep it a secret this year, that would be great. Fortunately, my whole family is on board.

We started our Advent "calendar" a week late. The kids really think that there are 14 days until Christmas. When we get home 12/31, we will celebrate Christmas Eve instead of New Year's Eve. Then, New Year's morning is just going to be our Christmas morning. I figure we'll be up around 4 am anyway, due to the jet lag, so why not?

We will spend lots of time with my family, which will be great because we're going to need some help with our boys considering we'll be tired, probably sick, and will need to provide ALL of Kayla's care--and we really don't know all that will be involved in that just yet.

This is the master plan. Of course, I have my backups for things like flight delays, but I really hope we won't have to deal with all of that. Last night, we did find out that we will get to spend Christmas Day with our daughter. So, at least we'll be with one of our three kids, although I really, truly have wrapped my brain around the fact that Christmas is just a date this year. We all know Jesus probably wasn't born December 25, so Christmas is when/what we make it. Ours will be celebrated 1/1/11.

But, there is still THE day that is called Christmas--the day we're supposed to remember Jesus being born for us. Honestly, I am kind of glad that Christmas Day this year will not be spent focused on gifts and food. Our Christmas Day won't be pretty, it won't be comfortable, it won't be lavish, but it will probably be the best Christmas we've ever experienced and the closest to how God actually wants us to remember the birth of His Son. I will miss my boys, but they will be with family who loves them and they won't know they're missing Christmas Day (hopefully). It will just be another day to them, which is perfect in my mind.

Books & Stuff

Once in a while, another adoptive parent will post something about a book they've purchased or another item. Lately, I've found myself a total sucker for all things Ethiopia.

In the past 2 weeks, I have purchased this beautiful doll that is based on a little girl in Ethiopia. We have other brown dolls, but oddly, none of them have curly hair. This doll has a gorgeous head of perfectly curly hair and I just got her yesterday. She is available at many stores, but we got her through Target. Her name is Rahel and she is part of a series of dolls. Part of the proceeds from their sale supports World Vision efforts in Ethiopia.
Then, as I was reading through other adoptive parent posts, I came across two recommended books today and I bought them--both from Amazon.

World School Day Adventure (Dora the Explorer). Author, Kellee Riley. Now, I'm not the biggest Dora fan, but it's a book--not an annoying cartoon show--and she visits Ethiopia!
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1442416734/ref=oss_product

The other book looks beautiful, from what I can see. I am excited to see the whole thing.
E is for Ethiopia (Word Alphabets). Photographer, Ashenafi Gudeta, et al.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/184507825X/ref=oss_product

Everything is looking better for leaving in just 5 days. We should know for sure by Monday whether or not we're getting on that plane on Wednesday. I sure hope so!

Edited to include:

I just found this blog with LOADS of great book reviews on it. Definitely worth checking out if you have a beautiful brown child in your home.
http://brownlikemebookreviews.blogspot.com/

No News

And, no news is good news, right? As far as we know, we're leaving in 6 days to bring home our baby girl.

Investigations

Just to keep my blog readers (whoever you may be) updated, here is what I now know...

Families are being chosen, completely at random, for investigation. It sounds like the US Embassy looks at the stack of paperwork in front of them for each embassy date (ours is supposed to be 12/28) and just picks some to investigate. There does not appear to be any rhyme or reason for the cases they select and they don't appear to just be investigating cases with red flags.

The investigation will be a physical investigation where the US Embassy sends one of their staff to the area where a child's birth parent, or finder, is from and then they will interview people in that area to determine whether or not the information in the paperwork is accurate. They are just trying to ensure that all adoptions are as ethical as possible.

Obviously, we fully support that measure, but it would have been nice to know about this possibility BEFORE we booked our $4067 worth of tickets and completely rearranged our lives for the next 2 weeks. Of course, we don't know whether or not we'll be selected and we may not know until the day before we are scheduled to leave, but I'd give it an honest 50/50, given what I know.

What does all this mean? Well, if we're picked, we won't be leaving 12/28. These investigations are predicted to take 1-2 months and then we'll have to wait our turn for another embassy date--which our agency only has two of each month. Fortunately, our agency has never had their ethics called into question, so I do not feel that there are any red flags with our case to be found. If there are, paperwork may need to be redone and it could take even longer. Worst case scenario is just that we won't have Kayla home until March, but she should still be coming home.

Of course, waiting until January/February/March would be devastating and rearranging all the details of this trip would be really difficult and very expensive, but I think we'll manage. My heart is what I'm most concerned about. This process has been hard and incredibly disheartening. I'm weary. I don't know how much more I can take.

A friend asked me how she should pray. If you're wondering, just pray for peace to surround our family. Obviously, God could intervene to bring our baby girl home, but so far, He hasn't. So, I've given up asking for that. He knows what I want, but I'm not going to change His mind or His plan, so I've just started praying that I will be at peace with whatever comes our way through the rest of this process.

I'll be sure to keep you posted. Again, we have no reason to think we will, or won't, be selected for investigation. It's just luck of the draw, or un-luck depending on how you look at it I suppose. Definitely keep us, and our baby girl, in your prayers. Living on pins and needles for now.

Ten, Twenty and Two

Well, we leave in 10 days. I'll be holding my breath all week, I just know it.

Some reports are saying we got as many as 20 inches of snow yesterday and I believe it. I'll have to post a new picture later. The drifts are insane--some up to 4 feet. Yuck.

Church was actually canceled for today. This is the first time I can remember church being canceled in my life. We are supposed to get more snow, the temps are bitterly cold and there is major wind.

Tomorrow is supposed to have a high temp of 2 degrees. 2 stinking degrees. Blech. I want to live some place warmer.

The good news? The weather looks good for the next 10 days, so weather shouldn't stop us from traveling. Of course, things could change, but I'll take it for now. Anything encouraging is worth focusing on!

10 days!!!

Snow and Towels

Well, in light of the fact that yesterday I could still see the tops of most of the plants in my yard and today it looks like this...
and it's nearly 11 am and my street hasn't been plowed, so I'm stuck at home, I decided to make two of these...
Cuz, don't you hate it when your kids outgrow the hooded towels that they love and the only ones they have in the stores are also too small and at least $20 unless they have devil horns and a tail? Well, I hate that, so I used my "spend $10, get $10 off" coupon at JCPenney to get two big towels and two hand towels for $5 to turn them into these. One blue, one orange. They don't have cute little animal heads on top, but the boys helped to make them, so hopefully that will win them over. Their little buns hang out of the old ones!

And trust me, there will be plenty of this today...
because they're already driving me nuts. There has been wrestling, kicking in the head (no, not by me), and game inventing that rules out the other kid--seriously, Reily invented a game for kids with orange hats not kids with red hats (guess who has orange and who has red!). Did I mention it's only 11 am?

Eleven

We leave in just 11 days and the "blizzard" today has pretty much guaranteed that I won't get much crossed off my to-do list today for our trip. Good thing I have 10 more days after today! I'll have to post pictures later. I've heard up to 12 inches are coming in today, with blowing drifts. Oh goody...

12

As per my usual, one down low day and we're back at it. 12 more days until we leave. Keep praying that remains true, please. I'm feeling more hopeful today than I was yesterday.

One Less

Faces of Adoption from Videos for AGCI on Vimeo.

Oh Lord, let my "one less" come home soon.

Wild Ride

Adoption truly is a wild ride. We are so close and yet so far away. This is one ride I would like to get off of very soon. My nerves are fried. My brain is tired. My heart has ached. We are scheduled to leave in 13 days, but it ain't over 'til the fat lady sings, folks. Changes to this process are constantly taking place and more changes have recently been announced. I don't know that it will affect us, but I don't know that it won't either (boy, there's some bad grammar in this note!). I won't believe she's ours until I get on that plane with her, hopefully three weeks from today.

Please pray with us that everything goes smoothly from here on out. Please pray that we get to leave in 13 days to bring her home and that she actually comes home with us. I just don't know how much more I can take and while I don't want to focus on the negative, it is always nagging at the back of my mind. So much has already gone wrong and we've already experienced so many delays. I'm just ready to be done and to get on with my life--as a mother to three beautiful kiddos.

That's all...

New paper chain

Well, this one is starting out much shorter than the last one and we've already taken two off since this picture. The white rings are all the days we'll be gone...it's too many. But, what can you do? Please pray for our boys (and my parents) while we're gone. Our youngest doesn't do too well when we're gone and 10 days is just too long.
Actually, our youngest is already really struggling. From the moment we announced that Kayla is coming home, he has been bouncing off the walls and pushing all the limits. I knew he would react poorly to the addition of a sister, but I didn't expect it to start before we got her home. He has already asked if Grandma and Grandpa can go get her and if she can live at their house instead of at our house. Whenever we watch the video of Kayla, he asks to watch the old one instead of the new one. What's the difference? The old one doesn't have his mommy and daddy loving on Kayla in it. It's just Kayla. So, he does like her and he does want her here, her just doesn't want her HERE here. Too bad, so sad. He'll survive, just like every other kid who has been displaced as the baby in the family, but it may be a bit rougher since we'll be gone for 10 days and when we get back, we'll will be bringing home a child who has more needs than a newborn and can already get into all of his stuff. Yikes! 2011 could be a bit rough.
Still, we're excited and down to 17 days until we leave.

Countdown

Wow! Our last countdown started at number 76 and I counted down every blasted day. This one started at 19 and we're already at 18. I also just realized that we are leaving exactly two months from the date that we left for Kayla's court hearing. For that trip, we left 10/22. For this one, we leave 12/22. Maybe 22 needs to become my new favorite number. Although, 18 is sounding pretty good right about now. 17 will sound even better tomorrow. This is going to fly by!

FINALLY!!!!!!!

So, I was eating lunch with my family, trying not to be really upset with the fact that we still had no idea when we would be leaving to bring our baby girl home when I got an email from our social worker.
It was titled "Merry Christmas!" She simply said we'd get to spend Christmas in Ethiopia. At first, I thought she was just responding to my earlier email about the possibility, but then I thought that maybe she knew something I didn't, so I decided to check Chris' email and there.it.was.
We leave 12/22 to bring Kayla home. I screamed, scaring the heck out of my family and then started crying. I can't believe we really get to bring her home. At long last, seriously LONG last (at least that's how it feels on this end).
Tickets are purchased...a whopping $4067 (gulp!). But, we're bringing our baby girl home. We will miss Christmas in the States, but my family is totally willing to pretend that it's not Christmas and to wait for us to get home to celebrate. We arrive home on 12/31, so we will celebrate Christmas Eve on New Year's Eve and Christmas Day on New Year's Day with ALL THREE OF OUR KIDS HOME!!!!!!!!!
Please pray with us, over the next 19 (yep, just 19) days that everything goes as planned and that we are definitely able to travel as planned to bring her home.
I can't believe we are finally almost done with this process. Time for the real fun to begin!

Life goes on...

Well, I have decided there is no sense in wallowing in what isn't happening in our lives. It is the holiday season and there is a LOT going on, so much to enjoy and be grateful for. We are going to enjoy it if I can help it. The first of many singing performances we'll get to watch this holiday season.

My brother works at the Planetarium in St. Point, so we took the kids for a star show. They loved it.

Chris was entertaining all the kids on Thanksgiving day.

Let the gifts begin!!!

Maeve, Gavin, Molly and Reily.

Every year, we go to the Mead for breakfast on the day after Christmas with family and friends. This year, two of the families we like to go with were only in town for Thanksgiving, so we decided to go on Saturday after Thanksgiving instead. It was fun even if the kids did get a little unruly after a while.

McKenya did her best to keep them from ruining the restaurant. When kids outnumber adults, we may have to skip this tradition.

Our Rotary puts together a light show at the zoo every year. When Chris' mom was here recently, we decided to go and even caught a ride on the horse drawn wagon.

On the wagon, enjoying the lights.

Decorating the tree. Normally we have two, but this year it just seemed smart to do less decorating, so we just have one. I'll be glad when it's time to undecorate.