Mother's Day...good again

Warning...this is another one of those heavy thoughts posts, so if you hate 'em, skip it.

Mother's day has been hard for me for the past few years. You see, this is not the first time that I've been the mother of three kids. In 2005, I celebrated my first Mother's Day with these two munchkins (and VERY pregnant with a third). It was a good day.
In 2006, I was supposed to celebrate Mother's Day with these three, but something happened the day before Mother's Day that I will never forget.
One of our foster boys had a "special needs" moment that started us down the process of losing both boys. It was crushing. These two boys that I had planned to adopt and had loved as my own for the past two years were slipping away. Mother's day hasn't been the same since then. It's been hard. I have wanted to celebrate. I had two beautiful biological boys that were still with me and who love me very much. I have the very best mom that a kid could ever hope for, but something (more specifically, two of my kids) were missing. It doesn't help that it all started that Mother's Day weekend either.

This year, however, I haven't dwelt on the sadness of that. This Mother's Day has been good and I've just let it be about celebration. I'm enjoying my day and I'm glad. It could be that having three kids again has healed some of that. It could be that time has healed my heart some more. I don't really know. I just know that I've enjoyed this day. I got hand made gifts and cards from my kids. My husband sent one of my boys into my room this morning with a menu and I got breakfast, of my choosing, in bed. Chris worked with Kayla on saying "mama" and she came into my room saying "mama, mama, mama". She's said it before, but not for quite a while and it felt good. We went to church where I got a cute flower and then home for lunch with my parents, brother and his wife. Now, the kids are napping and Chris is at work, but it's a beautiful day and we're going to enjoy pizza in the park once everyone is up. I'm loving today. It's a good day...thank goodness! I still miss my other two boys & I always will, but these three have made my day.